Ep. 2.20.1Assem parā et accipe auream fābulam, fābulās immō;Get a penny ready and hear a golden tale – or rather tales; Ep. 2.20.1nam mē priōrum nova admonuit, nec rēfert ā quā potissimum incipiam.for the new one has reminded me of earlier ones, and it does not matter which I begin with. Ep. 2.20.2Verānia Pīsōnis graviter iacēbat, huius dīcō Pīsōnis, quem Galba adoptāvit.Verania, the wife of Piso, lay seriously ill – I mean the Piso whom Galba adopted. Ep. 2.20.2Ad hanc Rēgulus vēnit.Regulus came to her. Ep. 2.20.2Prīmum impudentiam hominis, quī vēnerit ad aegram, cuius marītō inimīcissimus, ipsī invīsissimus fuerat!First, the shamelessness of the man, to come to a sick woman when he had been the bitterest enemy of her husband and most hateful to her! Ep. 2.20.3Estō, sī vēnit tantum;Let that pass, if he had only come; Ep. 2.20.3at ille etiam proximus torō sēdit, quō diē quā hōrā nāta esset interrogāvit.but he even sat close to her bed and asked on what day, at what hour she had been born. Ep. 2.20.3Ubi audiit, compōnit vultum intendit oculōs movet labra, agitat digitōs computat.When he heard, he composes his face, fixes his eyes, moves his lips, works his fingers, calculates.
Ep. 2.20.3Nihil.Nothing. Ep. 2.20.3Ut diū miseram exspectātiōne suspendit, "habēs" inquit "clīmactērium tempus sed ēvādēs.When he had kept the poor woman long in suspense, he said: 'You are in a critical period, but you will come through. Ep. 2.20.4Quod ut tibi magis liqueat, haruspicem cōnsulam, quem sum frequenter expertus."To make this clearer to you, I will consult a soothsayer whom I have often tested.' Ep. 2.20.5Nec mora, sacrificium facit, affirmat exta cum sīderum significātiōne congruere.Without delay he makes a sacrifice and declares that the entrails agree with the indication of the stars. Ep. 2.20.5Illa ut in perīculō crēdula poscit cōdicillōs, lēgātum Rēgulō scrībit.She, credulous as people are in danger, calls for her codicils and writes a legacy to Regulus. Ep. 2.20.5Mox ingravēscit, clāmat moriēns hominem nēquam perfidum ac plūs etiam quam periūrum, quī sibi per salūtem fīliī pēierāsset.Soon she grows worse, and dying she cries out that he is a wicked, treacherous man, worse even than a perjurer, who had sworn falsely to her by his son's life. Ep. 2.20.6Facit hoc Rēgulus nōn minus scelerātē quam frequenter, quod īram deōrum, quōs ipse cōtīdiē fallit, in caput īnfēlīcis puerī dētestātur.Regulus does this no less wickedly than often, calling down the anger of the gods, whom he himself deceives every day, on the head of his unhappy boy.
Ep. 2.20.7Velleius Blaesus ille locuplēs cōnsulāris novissimā valētūdine cōnflīctābātur: cupiēbat mūtāre testāmentum.Velleius Blaesus, the well-known rich ex-consul, was struggling with his last illness: he wanted to change his will. Ep. 2.20.7Rēgulus quī spērāret aliquid ex novīs tabulīs, quia nūper captāre eum coeperat, medicōs hortārī rogāre, quōquō modō spīritum hominī prōrogārent.Regulus, who hoped for something from the new will because he had lately begun to court him, kept urging and begging the doctors to prolong the man's breath somehow or other. Ep. 2.20.8Postquam signātum est testāmentum, mūtat persōnam, vertit allocūtiōnem īsdemque medicīs: "Quoūsque miserum cruciātis?After the will was sealed, he changes his part, turns his address round, and says to the same doctors: 'How long will you torture the poor man? Ep. 2.20.8quid invidētis bonā morte, cui dare vītam nōn potestis?"why do you begrudge a good death to one to whom you cannot give life?' Ep. 2.20.8Moritur Blaesus et, tamquam omnia audīsset, Rēgulō nē tantulum quidem.Blaesus dies and, as though he had heard everything, leaves Regulus not even a trifle. Ep. 2.20.9Sufficiunt duae fābulae, an scholasticā lēge tertiam poscis?Are two tales enough, or by the rule of the schools do you demand a third?
Ep. 2.20.9est unde fīat.there is material for one. Ep. 2.20.10Aurēlia ōrnāta fēmina signātūra testāmentum sūmpserat pulcherrimās tunicās.Aurelia, a woman of distinction, about to seal her will, had put on her most beautiful tunics. Ep. 2.20.10Rēgulus cum vēnisset ad signandum, "Rogō" inquit "hās mihi lēgēs."When Regulus had come to witness the sealing, he said: 'I ask you to leave these to me.' Ep. 2.20.11Aurēlia lūdere hominem putābat, ille sēriō īnstābat;Aurelia thought the man was joking, but he pressed in earnest; Ep. 2.20.11nē multa, coēgit mulierem aperīre tabulās ac sibi tunicās quās erat indūta lēgāre;in short, he forced the woman to open the will and to leave him the tunics she had on; Ep. 2.20.11observāvit scrībentem, īnspēxit an scrīpsisset.he watched her writing, and looked to see whether she had written it. Ep. 2.20.11Et Aurēlia quidem vīvit, ille tamen istud tamquam moritūram coēgit.And Aurelia indeed is alive, yet he forced this on her as though she were about to die. Ep. 2.20.11Et hic hērēditātēs, hic lēgāta quasi mereātur accipit.And this man takes inheritances, takes legacies, as if he deserved them.
Ep. 2.20.12in eā cīvitāte in quā iam, prīdem nōn minōra praemia immō maiōra nēquitia, et improbitās quam pudor et virtūs habent et virtus habent?But why do I exert myself in a state in which wickedness and dishonesty have long had rewards no smaller, indeed greater, than modesty and virtue? Ep. 2.20.13Aspice Rēgulum, quī ex paupere et tenuī ad tantās opēs per flāgitia prōcessit, ut ipse mihi dīxerit, cum cōnsuleret quam citō sēstertium sescentiēns implētūrus esset, invēnisse sē exta duplicia, quibus portendī mīliēns et ducentiēns habitūrum.Look at Regulus, who from being poor and humble has advanced through his crimes to such wealth that he told me himself, when he was consulting the omens on how soon he would make up sixty million sesterces, that he had found double entrails, by which it was portended that he would have a hundred and twenty million. Ep. 2.20.14Et habēbit, sī modo ut coepit, aliēna testāmenta, quod est improbissimum genus falsī, ipsīs quōrum sunt illa dictāverit.And he will have it, if only, as he has begun, he goes on dictating other people's wills to the very people whose wills they are, which is the most wicked kind of fraud.
Ep. 2.20.14Valē.Farewell.