Epist. 1.15.1Quae sit hiems Veliae, quod caelum, Vala, Salernī,
quōrum hominum regiō et quālis via (nam mihi Bāiās
Mūsa supervacuās Antōnius, et tamen illīs
mē facit invīsum, gelidā cum perluor undā
5per medium frīgus, sānē murtēta relinquī
dictaque cessantem nervīs ēlīdere morbum
sulfura contemnī vīcus gemit, invidus aegrīs,
quī caput et stomachum suppōnere fontibus audent
Clūsīnīs Gabiōsque petunt et frīgida rūra.What the winter is like at Velia, Vala, what the climate at Salernum, what kind of people the region has and what sort of road (for Antonius Musa says Baiae is useless for me, and yet makes me hateful to it, now that I am drenched in cold water in mid-winter. Of course the town groans that its myrtle groves are abandoned and its sulphur baths, said to drive lingering disease from the sinews, are scorned, jealous of the sick who dare to put head and stomach under the springs of Clusium and make for Gabii and the cold countryside. Epist. 1.15.10Mūtandus locus est et dēversōria nota
praeteragendus equus, "quō tendis?I must change my resort, and the horse be driven past his familiar inns. 'Where are you going?
Epist. 1.15.11Nōn mihi Cūmās
est iter aut Bāiās," laevā stomachōsus habēnā
dīcet eques;My road is not to Cumae or Baiae,' the rider will say angrily, pulling the left rein; Epist. 1.15.13sed equī frēnātō est auris in ōre);but a horse's ear is in his bridled mouth); Epist. 1.15.14maior utrum populum frūmentī cōpia pāscat;which people a larger supply of grain feeds; Epist. 1.15.15collēctōsne bibant imbrēs puteōsne perennīs
iūgis aquae (nam vīna nihil moror illīus ōrae:
rūre meō possum quidvīs perferre patīque;whether they drink collected rainwater or wells of ever-flowing water (for the wines of that coast I care nothing about: at my country place I can put up with and endure anything; Epist. 1.15.18ad mare cum vēnī, generōsum et lēne requīrō,
quod cūrās abigat, quod cum spē dīvite mānet
20in vēnās animumque meum, quod verba ministret,
quod mē Lūcānae iuvenem commendet amīcae);when I have come to the sea, I need something generous and mellow, to drive away cares, to flow with rich hope into my veins and my heart, to supply words, to commend me as young to a Lucanian sweetheart); Epist. 1.15.22tractus uter plūrīs leporēs, uter ēducet aprōs;which district rears more hares, which boars; Epist. 1.15.23utra magis piscīs et echīnōs aequora cēlent,
pinguis ut inde domum possim Phaeāxque revertī,
25scrībere tē nōbīs, tibi nōs accrēdere pār est.which seas hide more fish and sea-urchins, so that I may return home from there fat as a Phaeacian: it is right for you to write to us, and for us to trust you.
Epist. 1.15.26Maenius, ut rēbus māternīs atque paternīs
fortiter absūmptīs urbānus coepit habērī
scurrā vagus, nōn quī certum praesēpe tenēret,
imprānsus nōn quī cīvem dīnōsceret hoste,
30quaelibet in quemvīs opprobria fingere saevus,
perniciēs et tempestās barathrumque macellī,
quidquid quaesierat, ventrī dōnābat avārō.Maenius, when, having bravely run through his mother's and his father's property, he began to be thought a wit about town, a wandering buffoon with no fixed manger, who, when unfed, would not tell citizen from enemy, savage at inventing any insult against anyone, the ruin and tempest and abyss of the meat market, used to give whatever he had got to his greedy belly. Epist. 1.15.33Hic ubi nēquitiae fautōribus et timidīs nīl
aut paulum abstulerat, patinās cēnābat omāsī,
35vīlis et agnīnae, tribus ursīs quod satis esset;This man, when he had taken nothing or little from those who favoured or feared his wickedness, would dine on platters of tripe and cheap lamb, enough to satisfy three bears; Epist. 1.15.36scīlicet ut ventrēs lāmnā candente nepōtum
dīceret ūrendōs corrēctus Bestius.so that he would say, like Bestius reformed, that the bellies of spendthrifts should be branded with a red-hot plate.
Epist. 1.15.37Īdem,
quidquid erat nactus praedae maiōris, ubi omne
verterat in fūmum et cinerem, nōn herculē mīror,
40aiēbat, "sī quī comedunt bona, cum sit obēsō
nīl melius turdō, nīl vulvā pulchrius amplā."Yet the same man, whenever he had come upon some bigger plunder and had turned it all to smoke and ash, used to say: 'By Hercules, I am not surprised if some people eat up their property, since there is nothing better than a fat thrush, nothing finer than a large sow's womb.' Epist. 1.15.42Nīmīrum hic ego sum.Clearly I am this man. Epist. 1.15.42Nam tūta et parvola laudō,
cum rēs dēficiunt, satis inter vīlia fortis :
vērum ubi quid melius contingit et ūnctius, īdem
45vōs sapere et sōlōs āiō bene vīvere, quōrum
cōnspicitur nitidīs fundāta pecūnia vīllīs.For I praise what is safe and lowly when resources fail, stout enough amid cheap things; but when something better and richer comes my way, I, the same man, say that you alone are wise and live well, whose money is seen to be founded in gleaming villas.